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SubscriptionsGo to the Subscriptions Centre to manage your:My ProfileI came home the other night and the pipes were frozen. The apartment was the temperature of a Nunavut garden party (why paint your fingernails when nature will turn them purple for free) because I had left a window open and it was now frozen that way.So I did what I always do when my domestic situation seems on the verge of collapse. I called my landlords, a pair of burly Italian siblings who have cooled on me considerably since I locked myself out three times in one week and knocked on their door, begging to be let in.What I thought was a kind of Holly Golightly Pandora Charms Sale Clearance madcapness, they took as annoying and inconsiderate. And so when they came and fixed everything, Pandora Charms Clearance both hairdryers and cursing were employed.Sarah Palin, next to her husband Todd's boat in Dillingham, Alaska, while filming the eight part reality series Sarah Palin's Alaska. (Gilles Mingasson, Discovery Communications)After they left, I sat down and watched Sarah Palin's Alaska, and wondered what Sarah would have done.Though reproached on many fronts, the former governor of Alaska has nonetheless hit on reality show genius. Porn for the modern day female who wants to luxuriate in her urban ineptitude.In a typical episode, Sarah kits herself out in a sexy fleece outfit, dashes out to grab some salmon from a freezing cold river (rolling her eyes at the grizzly who's also at the river's edge), returns home to do 12 loads of laundry, and then feeds her massive brood a home cooked meal and a cake made from scratch.As you might surmise, Sarah makes me feel achingly inadequate. Which is, let's face it, why we watch reality shows to begin with.Why do I feel inadequate? Because, like several female acquaintances who I will not name, I don't know how to do anything. By that, I mean anything domestic.I don't know how to darn socks, I don't know how to unplug drains, I don't know how to fix things that break, and I don't know how to create a cheery centerpiece.Yes, I know. Sarah Palin uses rifle imagery and is single handedly responsible for the decline in civil political discourse Pandora Charms Sale Clearance in America. I do know this.But around my house, the woman rocks.Now I've tried to transform myself into a domestic goddess before. I watched How Clean Is Your House when it was on and tried to remember the different solutions required for cleaning different countertops.I've even taken cooking courses at the local community college. (There was a whole hour on knife use. Thrilling!)For years, my mother has tried to teach me how to cook a souffl and I have dutifully followed along.But when I try to recall those lessons, it's like trying to recall the Japanese phrases my ESL students once taught me: they are lost in the house of sand and fog.Of course, we remember things that we need to remember. And the key to this mystery, I suspect, lies in the wise words of a female colleague I once worked with on a television show.
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